Thursday, October 27, 2011

friday quotes

 "happiness is being alone every now and then. and happiness is coming home again."
                                                                                -charles schultz

Thursday, October 20, 2011

friday quotes

   "it's hard to stay strong when all you want to do is break down. hang on there. life will turn around for you."

i want to prove my point!

I've been living alone for almost two weeks now. And I have this roller coaster of emotions since I've been "independent".
I've felt pride for myself because I did have the courage to move out and leave the person that's been  treating me like trash since last year (or longer than that). I felt good that I have the freedom to do what I want without the questioning look of my family. I can use my time to my own liking. I can eat what I want. I can wear what I want (or wear nothing if I want). I decide for myself. I am free. And that is proving my point!
But a friend told me not to get drunk on freedom. Well, I can assure her that won't happen. Being drunk on something means you're getting more than you can handle because you're enjoying it too much to notice that you had enough.
But frankly speaking, I'm not enjoying this. I've been eating alone. Sleeping alone. Seeing nobody after work, just facing the four corners of my room.Nobody's asking  how my day was. If I feel okay? If I feel fine? Am I tired? Nobody.
All my life "solitude" is not a familiar word for me. I'm constantly surrounded by friends and family. I'm always with somebody.
But lately, I felt that solitary is what I need. I've been in chaos. I've felt like I've been in a war. That's why I need silence, solitude. I need to find my peace. I need to find myself. I've lost it in battle. Battle with my husband, with my own self, and with life.
And I'm still fighting loneliness just to prove my point. I've missed my daughter terribly but I have to prove my point. I'm broke but I'm keeping my pride just to prove my point. I am holding back my tears so no one will notice my pain just to prove my point. I keep on smiling though I'm broken inside just to prove my point.
I only pray that God will give me strength to carry on. I hope that in time I will find myself and I will know, finally, what I really want and what could really make me happy. And I'll have the courage to go after my own sunshine and rainbow. And finally people will see that I have proven my point. Finally....

Monday, October 10, 2011


              I DON'T FEEL PRETTY TODAY..... :-(

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Mellow Yellow Monday #9: my humble abode


I recently made a huge decision. Well, sort of a selfish decision. But I know in my heart I needed this. I left our house and the people in it.  Including my daughter, whom I miss dearly. But I have to do this. I need to find myself. I felt that the "me" that I knew was slowly disappearing. I just hope that I'll find the strength to fight loneliness and find the answers to all my questions. Well, here is my new home....alone! :-)

Friday, June 3, 2011

friday quotes: prayer

Lord, you know what is my heart's true desire. I know I am making a very selfish decision that could cost me everything. But I deserve to be happy. I ask for your blessing, Lord....

Sunday, May 29, 2011

From A-pad to Loveseat

Last Saturday I intend to buy an imitation A-pad at Greenhills for my daughter as a surprise back-to-school gift to her. Unfortunately, the weather doesn't go with that plan. Instead, I ended up buying a loveseat for our house. Well, I thought, I would just give her the A-pad as a birthday gift on July.

So from this:

to this:

Not a bad decision, right?

Mellow Yellow Monday #8: loveseat


This is the new addition to our humble abode. Just bought it yesterday and it costs me P3,500.00. It's been a while since we had a decent sofa. And all those times I felt ashamed to invite guests. But now...mi casa es tu casa! Welcome...

Friday, May 20, 2011

friday quotes: trust

"where trust does not reside,

                                              love cannot survive."

Monday, May 16, 2011

Mellow Yellow Monday #7: Triple Celebration


This is the cake from our previous triple celebration held last May 8. As you can see we celebrated my parents' 35th wedding anniversay (May 2), my brother's birthday (May 10) and of course, the Mother's day. It is a small family affair and we enjoyed our private party. Happiness....

Thursday, May 5, 2011


I'm tired, I need a break!

For the past few months, this has been my constant complain. I felt so tired after work. Tired after my household chores. Tired of all the bills and other concerns of my family.I feel that my body is giving up. Parang nauupos na kandila (melting like a candle). Sometimes, I find myself crying into sleep over self-pity. I felt so alone. But, I don't have anyone to blame but myself. I choose to be like this: overworked, underpaid, unappreciated. Sobrang 'bitter' ba?

Don't get me wrong, I love my work. I enjoy interacting with different people though it means answering hundred calls everyday. The pay is sufficient, and the co-workers are so-so,but the boss is so mabait.

At home, I enjoy doing the chores myself. We don't need househelp because we have a tiny abode and I can manage the cleaning, the cooking, the laundry, etc. My daughter helps..sometimes. My husband....of course!
Well, honestly I would rather choose to stay indoors and do some cleaning than go out to the mall or other places. Sorry to my superfriends, Dinah and Rona. They always make an effort to invite me to do something out of work, to enjoy myself. Most of the time I decline. Walang panggastos. And I have a personal problem with my husband, that is why I don't feel like celebrating or enjoying anything.

Sometimes I consciously work myself out so that my body become numb with all my worries in life. Amazingly, it helps! Doing routines made me stop thinking for a while and I enjoy that. It is good for my migraine.

Not to worry my dear folks. I can handle everything. Ako pa! I just need some rest and then I will be alright. Back to my own busy-but-cheerful self.

In the meantime....let's get back to work!

Thursday, April 28, 2011

friday quotes: journey


Friday, March 25, 2011

friday quotes: friendship

                  "friendship is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies..."

Monday, March 21, 2011

Mellow Yellow Monday #6: Be a Hero


                            The shirt said it all....

Thursday, March 17, 2011

friday quotes: love and happiness

                               "   to love is to place our happiness in the happiness of another...."              

Monday, March 14, 2011

Ganda ng Maynila!!!

Today I had  an early schedule at Department of Foreign Affairs for my passport application. Me, being without sense of direction,has no other choice than to let my husband take  me there via his motorcycle. It's been a long time since I rode with him and somehow it's a good idea that I did. I get to see Manila as if for the first time.

I've been working for eleven years at a hardware company located at Sta. Cruz, Manila. But never did I thought Manila as a beautiful place worthy of visiting. For me it is a place with lots of dirty, drooling and smelly horses which I had a slight phobia of. A place with dirty streets, never ending traffics, haven for beggars and street children, and of course (and still), the horses. 

Today I saw Manila differently. As we entered Abad Santos St., I didn't even notice that we were nearing Divisoria because the place was so calm in the morning. There were only a few people and not a cop in sight! Binondo for me is a mixture of old and new age. Even with its towering establishments, the old chinatown was somehow preserve. I really love the "friendship arc" which is at the heart of Binondo. The Binondo Church was astonishing. Its structure is amazing. I saw the details clearly kanina. I never attended a mass there yet but one day I will. We usually went to Quiapo Church. The Intramuros golf area was a beautiful sight in the morning as if the waters from the garden sprinkler are performing a synchronize dance routine. Wonderful! And I love how the people of Manila became health conscious. I saw lot of joggers, cyclist and aerobic dancers around Luneta. I would have join them if not for my scheduled appointment. I also love Roxas Blvd. in the morning. A kinda-old-school-love-to stroll-in-the-morning way. 

However simple I may sound as I describe the City of Manila, for me it is breathtaking.

By the way, my husband took me to the wrong place. He left me at the old DFA office at Arnaiz St. I was supposed to go to the new DFA office at Macapagal  Ave. Thanks to Manong Guard for giving me direction I was able to find the place and be there on time.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

friday quotes: love

"Although love could grow in times of peace, it tempered in battle"

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Mellow Yellow Monday #5: Happy Valentines!


This is a gift from my boss, Sir Jude Cue. Each of us girls at the office received this delicious chocolate to celebrate the day of hearts/love. Aside from this I also received a bouquet of flowers from my husband.

Happy Valentines everyone!

Monday, February 7, 2011

Mellow Yellow Monday #4: Bulong


This picture was taken last Saturday after watching the movie "Bulong". The kids were supposed to be watching the SS501's concert at the PICC but problem occur regarding the ticket. So we end up taking the kids to watch this movie, which is by the way a very nice one.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

friday quotes: saying sorry

                   " apologizing doesn't always mean that you're wrong or the other is right. sometimes, you just value the person much more than your pride..."


Monday, January 31, 2011

happy birthday dinah!

Happy birthday to a friend who's very dear to me. No other person knows me more than you do. You know we can talk with our eyes only. I tried to do that with my other friends, it just doesn't work. You are very dear to me. See this note? I kept it. I had a hard time finding it last night though pero it's worth it. Can you still see the date? Tagal na natin ngtyatyagaan. Hehehe...

Thank you so much for being a friend and for being a true person. Wish you all the best of health and the best of luck in everything. Love you!

Thursday, January 27, 2011

friday quotes: envy

"never hate people who are jealous of you, instead LOVE them because they are the ones who think you are better than them...."

Sunday, January 23, 2011

Mellow Yellow Monday #3: Araw


This was taken last January 16 infront of the Dept. of Tourism building. I love how the sun shines come night time.

Friday, January 21, 2011

Thursday, January 20, 2011


You're not a true pinoy if you've never been to LUNETA!

Last weekend, my 'dabarkads'  and I decided to visit Luneta. I'm so glad to see that it is being rehabilitated to encourage other people to visit Luneta and go outdoors than just visit the mall to spend their time and money.

The first thing I notice is the Department of Tourism building. I didn't notice it before when me and my family frequents the park when I was a child.  I love the facade. The big sun glows when it's nighttime. A big irony according to my daughter.

A new addition to the park is the humongous Lapu-lapu statue that is a gift from Koreans. The only problem with this place is the large steps of the stairs that you have to take if you want to take picture beside the statue. By the time you reach the top 'hingal kabayo' ka na.

This one is actually the Administration and Security Office but we named it "Bahay ni Rizal" because of it's ethnic look. The two girls at the gate are applying as security guards. Hehehe...

Another attraction at the park for the kids is the 'Thomas and Friends' train ride. This will take you on a brief tour at the park in a very slow pace. Beware, this is not for free. It cost P50.00 for adults and P20.00 for kids.

And the most popular addition at the Luneta today is the dancing fountain. It's a far cry from the Khalifa Fountain at the Burj Dubai but still, A for the effort of the Manila City Council for this.

Nice di ba?

No matter how baduy going to the park is, I would still prefer it than staying at the mall.

Monday, January 17, 2011

Mellow Yellow Monday #2: El Pueblo I Condo


This is where me and my friends spent our weekends. Ate Arlyn lives here and she is so gracious to allow us to have a sleep over whenever we can. Here we can forget our obligations for a while and enjoy our time together as friends. Last weekend is my second time to sleep at her unit, and I'm pretty sure there will be more to come. We love staying at this place.

Sunday, January 9, 2011

Mellow Yellow Monday #1: Peanut


The first good deed I received today is a handful of peanuts given by my officemate.

A good way to start the week!

Thursday, January 6, 2011

friday quotes: decision

Decision are the hardest to make especially when it's a choice between where you should be and where you wanted to be.